Brett Garten, Movie Extraordinare
Cinematic Sommelier
4.5
I’ve heard this was made as a middle finger to those who liked the original… mission accomplished. “Insulting” is the one word I would use to describe this movie. And not in a good way. There have been films that challenge an unhealthy point of view or hold a mirror up to something and force the audience to think. This isn’t that. It’s just as sad as the guards beating up on Arthur the entire runtime. Unnecessary and sad.
You’ll notice this one doesn’t have a score. I’m not proud of this, but in the spirit of transparency… I walked out with ~1 hour left. It’s that bad. I couldn’t do it anymore.
I admire than Francis Ford Coppala putting his own money on the table and truly swinging for the fences with a daring piece of art… but I’ll be damned if it wasn’t one of the toughest watches of my career. And I’ve watch Tommy Wiseau’s “The Room” multiple times.
The dialogue is childish, the story is a mess at best, and the special effects are laughable (especially given the budget). Save yourself the 2 hours and go see literally anything else.
8.1
The movie itself is everything you can really ask of an unnecessary sequel ~35 years after the original. Michael Keaton seamlessly slips back into the Beetlejuice character and Jenna Ortega absolutely kills it as Astrid Deetz. Just enough new perfectly balanced with the right dose of nostalgia to thread the needle for a great time in the cinema. The Tim Burton aesthetic remains undefeated.
What made this one special for me was the venue. As I made my way through Iowa for a baseball game and a football game at the grad school I attended virtually during COVID, I stumbled upon The Last Picture House in Davenport, Iowa, which I cannot recommend highly enough. From the lobby built for hangouts with new and old friends, to the rooftop outdoor showtimes, to the cinnamon sugar for topping popcorn… it’s a 10/10 for me. AND Dolby Cinema!
https://www.lastpicturehouse.com/home/
7.4
It’s an “Aliens” movie. If you watched “Twisters” and were wishing it was a xenomorph picking off unexpecting morons instead of mother nature teaching lessons in humility, then this is the blockbuster for you!
What this one lacks in originality and overall storytelling it more than makes up for in cinematography and ambiance. Holy shit is it beautiful. There’s not a single frame of this one that’s not a veritable work of art. It’s what keeps you invested even as the narrative wanders down the familiar old path of “oh no… they did the thing and are going to die now…”
9.1
Ah… the magic of cinema.
It’s not often you get to experience the culmination of 25-30 years of storytelling and wish fulfillment with 500 of your closest friends in an IMAX theater. This one truly turned out to be Fox-Marvel’s “Endgame.” Not only did Reynolds manage to stick the landing and close out one of the greatest superhero trilogies on the highest of notes, but also managed to shoehorn in every cameo and magical moment we didn’t even know we needed. A comic book movie that can cause guttural laughter and move me to tears is something of beauty. A work of cinematic art. Those ripping on the film are doing so because they’re not bought into the bit. Which is fair. It’s a weird world to enter. But if you’re willing to take off your thinking cap and let the Merc with a mouth work his magic for two and a half hours… you’re going to be hard pressed to find a more entertaining film this year. If we’re talking comic book movies, this is honestly the first one since “Avengers: Endgame” to not tarnish the brand.
*Stay through the credits for a nostalgic trip down memory lane. I didn’t expect such care to be taken, but I’ll be damned if this wasn’t the most “respectful of the legacy” film in AGES in Marvel. Well done!
Brett Garten, Movie Extraordinare 