Author: Brett_G

“House of Gucci”

7.8

So much pettiness, so little time, so many family members to keep track of. One of the dumbest public missteps since Jerry Springer tried to pay a sex worker with a check. Lesson: don’t hire a hitman on the cheap.

Who would have believed that Lady Gaga would be the best actor in a film alongside such powerhouse names? Not I, but here we are. The woman commands your attention every time she’s on-screen, elevates Adam Driver’s already fantastic performance, and is worlds better than whatever offensively Mario Brothers impression Italian accent Jared Leto landed on. How did no one tell him that his entire character was overshot?

The film may be about a half-hour too long, but every frame is absolutely gorgeous to take in. Ridley Scott focuses his talents usually stretched over an epic scale film onto an intimate family drama, and the attention to detail shows in every scene.

Side Note: Sperry’s Movie House is AMAZING! The heated, massaging recliners, the prime location, the delicious food… Home run!

Sperry’s Movie House, Downtown Holland

“I Spit on Your Grave” (1978)

7.4

You know the violence and gruesome revenge that “Promising Young Woman” was missing? I found it, and then some. In the vein of the hyperviolence of 1970s slashers like “Texas Chainsaw Massacre,” this film gets… uncomfortable at times with how far it’s willing to push the envelope. If you have a weak stomach, this is definitely one to avoid. Also, a trigger warning to those sensitive to violent sexual encounters. As mentioned before, like in “Promising Young Woman,” our main character Jennifer has all the justification in the world to leave these men mangled by the time the credits roll.

“Love Hard”

7.9

I think the lesson here is that people are shallow? But they also have heart when you emotionally kidnap them and break down their hard outer shell, and can learn their lesson and become fully functional humans after severe personal trauma.

The good old Netflix rom-com. You know you’re in for a solid hour and a half of heart and laughs. Not too deep, not too sweet, not too serious. Just right. In the end, I’m just glad to see that Jian Yang from “Silicon Valley” found love after shutting down his tech talent incubator in California and moving back in with his parents. (Really inside joke, I apologize)

“The Green Knight”

6.8

Well, that was… something.

Clearly based on a fable from the days of old, this film embraces A24’s “what the hell did I just watch?” method of filmmaking. You may not fully understand what it is that you just watched, but I can assure you that you will leave absolutely fascinated by it. Also, maybe a little disturbed. If I had to come up with a motto for this film, it would be “drunk decisions often lead to the best adventures.”

“The King’s Man”

8.5

The prequel no one asked for, but looking back, should have been asking for.

The origin story of the Kingsman, an eloquently told family drama intertwined with global geopolitics affected by international family drama, wrapped in one of the slickest action films of the year. The directing, cinematography, and choreography are off the chart and exceed the already high bar of the Kingsman franchise. Prepare to be thoroughly entertained for two hours by a political drama. I’m as surprised as you are I just said that. However, if you drench it in scotch, high tea, and high octane adrenaline, you have a hit on your hands. Rasputin is the least interesting part of this, and that’s saying something. Well worth the wait through multiple delays to finally see this action-packed masterpiece on the big screen. Too bad that D-Box motion seats are no longer a fad. This movie would have been INSANE in one of those!