Brett Garten, Movie Extraordinare
Cinematic Sommelier
8.2
What could have fallen incredibly flat by playing itself instead decided to dive right into the deep end and take the audience on an incredible emotional journey I think we all can relate to. The reflection on the power of “what if” and unfinished business on our perception of reality. How different versions of love accompany us on this journey through life. A much sweeter ending than I was anticipating halfway through…
5.1
Let me save you three hours of your life you can never get back. It’s… it’s bad.
For that runtime, it felt rushed, confusing, and in the end, lackluster. The battle scenes had hints of greatness, but were plagued with CGI that makes Marvel look masterful. And sex scenes that make “The Room” look romantic.
With the subtlety of a sledgehammer, let Ridley Scott drag you through a script of Napoleon’s life that feels like someone read the Amazon synopsis of a memoir, drag 6 Red Bulls, did a line of cocaine, and wrote in crayon before lighting the script on fire and just telling Joaquin Phoenix to “do Joker stuff” while dressed in a French military outfit.
Did that last paragraph not make sense? Well, you now know the feeling of leaving the theater after this one, but I saved you approximately 2 hours and 57 minutes of your life. You’re welcome.
P.S. The British had BOATS! So not fair!
P.P.S. The first word in the below trailer is “Long.” That sums it up pretty well. Freudian slip by the marketing department at Apple Studios.
8.4
I still prefer the book on this one, but the movie gave it a run for its money and was a work of art itself presenting this important story.
While Leo puts on another great performance (and chalks up another epic meltdown scene) alongside the truly menacing Robert De Niro, I want to call attention to Lily Gladstone as Molly Burkhart and Tatanka Means as Agent John Wren. My biggest reason for preferring the book to the movie is due to the perspective of the story being told. The book’s focus on the FBI team and the community impacted was a much more impactful viewpoint, but narratively, I understand why Scorsese went this route. The ending was a creative Hail Mary pass to tie a bow on such an unsatisfying ending to the story. There was no good way to land the plane on a story with such a lack of closure/happy ending. The thing that the film nails is the tone. You’re uncomfortable for the entire runtime, waiting for the other shoe to drop, unsure of who you can trust, sensing the pervasive danger around every corner.
It’s absolutely gorgeous in its cinematography and the overall aesthetic of the film. The editing made the three and a half runtime pass more quickly than I was expecting, but it definitely tested my back’s tolerance for a single sitting in non-recliner cinema seats. It’s definitely on of those “Hollywood couldn’t write something this insane and interesting” stories, finally making its way onto the big screen, with a perfect cast and soundtrack.
Killers of the Flower Moon: The Osage Murders and the Birth of the FBI https://a.co/d/aSIbW1M
8.8
Just… AMAZING. There aren’t words I can put here that will do this one justice. Not only is the documentary side well crafted, but the current day conversation is devastatingly deep and impactful, giving “Ted Lasso” a run for it’s money in the inspiration department.
7.5
… still a more believable accent than his Mario Bros. Impression that was Paola Gucci in “House of Gucci.” And Anne Hathaway grounds the madman in a realism that almost makes him likable. Makes his moves understandable until they cross over into unthinkably incoherent.
This is one of those “Hollywood can’t write a story this wild” situations where they try to pigeonhole the story to fit into a series narrative, and almost stick the landing. The soundtrack is a banger, nonetheless. Another AppleTV+ winner.
Brett Garten, Movie Extraordinare 