Author: Brett_G

Netflix Suspense/Thriller

“Archive 81”

By Brett_G on

8.2

They had it… They freaking had it!!! Why does everything have to have franchise potential?!?!

The narrative momentum, the closure we all yearn for in conclusion, the goodwill we build as an audience interacting with these characters… all taken out back and shot. Can I hold a seance and time travel to a point in time where I forget how much I despise this ending?

Aside from the way they crash-landed the plane, this series was spectacular. The way it built tension, caused me to care about the characters, and kept me on the edge of my seat was everything I could have asked for in a Netflix series based on a podcast. Then it ended with me angrily yelling at my TV.

I filed this one alongside “Censor” and “Broadcast Signal Intrusion” as one of the best pieces of original horror/thriller material in the past two or three years. I’d take the “what the hell was that?!?” ending of “Censor” over this. They lost a full point based on the ending.

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Horror/Thriller

“The Cursed”

By Brett_G on

8.5

“As silver is melted in a furnace, so you shall be melted in the midst of it, and you shall know that I am the LORD; I have poured out my wrath upon you.” – Ezekiel 22:22

This one blew me away, I’m not going to lie. I came out thoroughly impressed by how far and above this one hurdled my expectations. Biblical/religion-based horror at the height of its powers. Pulled off by a fantastic cast of mostly new faces. This is a masterclass in horror filmmaking, from directing to cinematography.

Lessons to be learned :

  1. Don’t mess with the gypsy women.
  2. If someone threatens you with a curse on your family, don’t dismiss it.
  3. Silver bullets come in handy. Always have a few handy.
  4. For the love of all that is holy… DON’T GO INTO THE OMINOUS FOG ALONE!!!

I spent the majority of the runtime a clenched ball of nerves and still have a kink in my neck from turning away from a couple of well-executed jump scares. This one caught me off guard in the best way, and I highly recommend it if you’re a fan of the genre. It’s up there with the A24 stable of unsettling colonial horror.

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Comedy

“Bring Back Apu”

By Brett_G on

8.2

Finally! Akaash Singh comes out with a fantastic half-hour special that perfectly complements his “Flagrant 2” podcast (which I also highly recommend) counterpart Andrew Schulz’s exceptional “Schulz Saves America.” So get ready to be just the right amount of uncomfortable while you confront some of the timeliest material in the game today. This crew doesn’t miss!

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Amazon Prime Rom-Com

“I Want You Back”

By Brett_G on

7.8

Oh my god! They fell in love WITH EACH OTHER after trying to force their failed relationships?!?!? NO WAY!!!

Cynicism aside, I thoroughly enjoyed this one. Not only because I loved the cast, but because it was a well-told story with heart. Heartful people committing heartless acts with good intentions. That tension leads to some great chemistry and humor. Prime Video gunning for Netflix’s domination of the romantic comedy genre with this one.

I think we’ve all been there and can all see where and how this one ends, but it’s still a fun ride. Unless you’re currently in the “I’m going to win them back” stage of a breakup. In which case, I feel for you. (Not that I’ve ever done it *wink*) You will get through this and be able to laugh at the complete ass you are about to make of yourself. It’s all in the name of character growth. The key is to buy chocolate or ice cream you can later eat yourself to drown the humiliation. Then you can watch this movie and laugh instead of cry.

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Horror/Thriller Netflix

Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2022)

By Brett_G on

6.5

Was this a confusing take on the franchise? Yes.

Was this the best “Texas Chainsaw” film? No.

Was this the worst “Texas Chainsaw” film? Also no.

As the credits roll, you realize that Netflix may have been out past its skis on this one. This one is towards the bottom in a sea of phenomenal horror reboots. And Netflix can handle making great horror films and series. That part puzzled me quite a bit. If you’re here for the story or to see the franchise branch out and bloom, you’re going to be disappointed. However, if you want to see Leatherface mow down a sea of hipsters threatening him with being canceled as they record their untimely demise on their smartphones, then this is the movie for you. By far some of the most violent and creative kills in the entire series. Following in the footsteps of the other recent horror reboots, this movie gets very creative in the death department.

If you can make it past the first 20-25 minutes of one of the more clunky liftoffs I’ve seen on the screen in a LONG time… You won’t hate it.

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