Brett Garten, Movie Extraordinare
Cinematic Sommelier
6.1
Hike up your thong, and saddle up your pony… no new movies meant we eventually had to go here.
Holy weird movie Batman. A behind the scenes look at the world of male exotic dancing. A smarter(?) version of “showgirls”… maybe. The race is about as tight as Dallas’s leather pants.
Amazing choreography. A truly inspiration story about chasing your dreams. And a weird side quest about entrepreneurship and investment in day trading and commercial real estate. And furniture.
9.9
… on the big screen! This one will now forever have a special place in my heart.
The beginning chapter of one of the all time greatest film trilogies. So much great action. So many groundbreaking special effects. At the heart, a heartwarming story with relationships that jump off the screen thanks to the cast’s phenomenal chemistry and talent.
Lorraine… *swoon*
Every scene impactful. One of the best opening exposition dumps I’ve ever seen. I never before fully realized how covertly Zemeckis catches the audience up to speed before we even meet a character during the opening titles. One of Alan Silvestri’s, if not Hollywood’s most iconic scores.
Time circuits – On
Flux capacitor – Fluxing
Movie – Fantastic
6.5
Ah… franchise fatigue.
This series finale is a completely unnecessary addition to the anthology, but it was the 80s, so what the hell? A solid action film that didn’t have to worry about overusing the shark finds it’s place in history as the most obnoxious JAWS. This time… it’s personal. Unlike the past 2 times this shark has returned from the dead to wipe out the remaining members of the Brody family. They also lean pretty heavily on the original, from a not so subtle Chief Brody portrait in the beginning, to the score sounding strangely familiar, to the theft of the ending. Luckily, the shark literally jumps the series in this film, signifying the end of an era.
8.5
One of the all time great summer vacation films. Having lived in a summer tourist trap most of my life, I definitely identified with Cammie. The love story between Buck and Cammie is one of my favorites in film. The old school summer fling. John Candy and Dan Aykroyd are at the height of their powers in this one, and have great onscreen comic chemistry. So many great one liners. And a the bald-headed killer bear of Clare County.
Lock and load your shotgun lamp, and take a ride in ‘suck my wake’ across Lake Potowotominimac. Fall in love with a local at the pool hall, and tackle the challenge of eating “the ol’ 96er.” No better way to spend a summer. Yakety yak, don’t talk back.
6.9
Before “Blackfish,” you had this film to convince you not to go to Sea World, for fear of being trapped in an underwater walkway with strangers while you wait to be devoured by a killer shark. The underwater restaurant looks pretty badass, though.
It’s in 3D, like every other horror movie around this time, and has one of the most laughable finales in cinematic history. However, still an entertaining watch, if you’ve never seen it before.
Brett Garten, Movie Extraordinare 