Brett Garten, Movie Extraordinare
Cinematic Sommelier
7.2
“If you want something done right, you oughta do it yourself.”
What he doesn’t mention is the Scarface-sized mountain of cocaine that led to this decision. God love him, Stephen does his best. Creates an… interesting film. Get ready to laugh, get kind of weirded out, and then laugh some more. Basically a less dreadful version of Terminator. The machines may come to life, but they only kill you if you’re an imbecile. Crank up the AC/DC, and enjoy the ride.
6.9
If you liked the first one, you’ll like this one. Precisely what you expect from it. No more, no less. Prepare for a hour and a half of uncomfortable laughter bordering on being offended.
7.9
Wes Craven at the height of his powers.
Turns out “Scary Movie” is just a rip-off of the master himself. Such a perfectly constructed story, including fourth wall breaks in all the right places. I have laughed this hard at a horror film in quite a while. It was also genuinely scary when it needed to be, pointing to the craftsmanship of the filmmaker. Very well done.
6.1
Uh… I’m still not sure what it is I just watched.
There was a werewolf, an angry for no reason sheriff deputy, and a senile sheriff. Past that, I couldn’t really tell you. I laughed at the pure absurdity a couple times, but left completely confused. Very well could be that I missed some deeper meaning here. If you are aware of this hidden pearl of knowledge, feel free to enlighten me.
8.1
Right up there with “The Intern” for me in Robert De Niro’s repertoire. A heartfelt, laugh out loud film with a fantastic cast. Everyone fits their role perfectly, and really pulls at the heart strings at just the right times in between laughs. I wasn’t expecting as much emotional depth as I got from this hour and a half. The subtle love story, the unique play on family dynamics, this film really hit them all.
One hidden blessing of this unprecedented time is finding these usually buried films playing front and center on the big screen. The audience in the theater covered ages 8-80, and we all came out smiling under our masks.
Brett Garten, Movie Extraordinare 