Category: Rom-Com

“Love Hard”

7.9

I think the lesson here is that people are shallow? But they also have heart when you emotionally kidnap them and break down their hard outer shell, and can learn their lesson and become fully functional humans after severe personal trauma.

The good old Netflix rom-com. You know you’re in for a solid hour and a half of heart and laughs. Not too deep, not too sweet, not too serious. Just right. In the end, I’m just glad to see that Jian Yang from “Silicon Valley” found love after shutting down his tech talent incubator in California and moving back in with his parents. (Really inside joke, I apologize)

“The Kissing Booth 3”

6.5

*steps onto soapbox*

My contempt for the second installment finally killed it. It completely murdered my love for this adorkable series. So much unnecessary drama, such an unoriginal story, such an out-of-date soundtrack, such poor decision-making on the part of Elle. They seriously try to retcon Noah as not being a complete asshole and worth choosing over Marco?!?! What the hell, Elle? You know what? I’m happy for Marco. He’s finally free of this stupidity. Go live your life, my man. Don’t you dare look back. These 3 (4 if you count Rachel) deserve each other’s misery. My lord… so much cringe. Burn the beach house down and salt the earth on which it stood. Sprinkle it with holy water. Please leave this as a trilogy. Instead of capturing lightning in a bottle, this series is like being struck by lightning three times in the same spot. I had to finish it, but my ride along the sunset coast ended with me pulling a Thelma and Louise into the Pacific to free myself from this crew as the credits began to roll.

“The Sweetest Thing”

6.9

Hey! It’s the guy from “Hung” on HBO! In a movie about as worthy of a parental warning as “Hung.”

I love Cameron Diaz, so this was going to be a winner in my book. The classic “someone with a guarded heart meets their kryptonite” love story with a fun road trip movie mixed in for good measure. The film did get a little in the weeds when it tried to be a musical a couple of times but got back on track to check all of the classic rom-com boxes by the time the credits rolled. The title is spot-on. This film is all frosting and will satisfy your sweet tooth.

The whole thing emits a strong sense of disarming charm. It’s a wonderful, “turn your brain off and watch the unlikely couple fall in love” film.

“Something Borrowed”

4.5

As a romantic comedy connoisseur, I really hate to do this, but here we go…

This movie is asinine. (I contemplated a f**k filled review, but then Facebook doesn’t like me)

Why did Dex ever get with Darcy in the first place? Why did Rachel stay friends with Darcy after she hijacked a first date and stole Dax? Why did Dax never ask questions? Why is anyone friends with Darcy? How are Rachel and Dax successful as lawyers? They fold like cheap lawn chairs under the slightest pressure. How in the hell does Rachel actually take Dax back after everything? How was THAT a happily ever after? This movie just pissed me off for the entire runtime. But I trudged through it, so you might not have to.

John Krasinski is the only redeeming character here. And the movie takes great pleasure in narratively kicking him in the testicles at every turn. These 2 hours were more painful than watching him wait years for Pam.

“Sideways”

7.6

Think “The Hangover,” but in California wine country with only two friends. And one is an insufferable author. It’s fun to see these two play off each other. The eternal optimist and the eternal Eeyore.

The story is pretty predictable, the soundtrack is the same one you get with every other rom-com from this era, but the laughs are plentiful. Pour yourself a nice Merlot (I’m a Bourdeaux guy myself), sit back, and relax while enjoying this tale of these two gents getting their grapes crushed by life.