Cinematic Sommelier
5.9
Opera too high brow? Well, have I got the phantom movie for you! White masked recluse and all!
This movie was hilariously bad, even by slasher standards, but I did find myself eventually surrendering to the absurdity to enjoy some laughter at the ridiculousness killing my brain cells with each unlikely onscreen murder.
Side Note: “Phantom of the Opera” is my favorite Broadway musical, so this one was subject to a strict lens and high bar.
7.7
Toe pick!
Well, this one gave me some flashbacks… but are they really flashbacks if you still know the person and still bicker like “the old days?” I digress…
This movie is quirky and a bit cheesy, but perfect in its own weird way. It’s a fantastic feel good rom-com with so many one-liners I couldn’t keep track of them all through the laughter. The story isn’t anything to necessarily write home about, but the cast is perfection, and skate the thin ice between good-bad and just bad like professional figure skaters. A Herculean task that they rise to and exceed. So lace up your skates and sit in on a tight hour and a half of fun with this one!
7.1
Gotta be careful of those hometown bar run-ins… all sorts of trouble.
I was of course all-in, as I am with any project that includes Alison Brie. For obvious reasons. 😍
The film itself was pretty par for a course. A cute love story, some hilarious hijinks. Golf course streaking. A surprise “Community” cast reunion between Abed and Annie. Everything you could want from a rom-com most couples probably won’t finish this February holiday season. Ending on “Semi Charmed Life” was a great touch, director… Dave Franco?!? Wow. Did not see that coming.
Here’s to hoping your Valentine’s Day isn’t as awkward as this movie. ❤️
7.7
I slipped in a puddle on my way out of the theater, but the movie was surprisingly great…
Dare I say, this was the best of the trilogy, AND has more heat in the first 5 minutes than the entirety of the “Fifty Shades” trilogy. The stripper-verse ends up having character arcs and everything! AND, Salma Hayek and Channing Tatum… both still got it!
Well directed, well written, well executed. I’m as shocked as you are. Almost as shocked as the theater of all women who commended me for braving an opening night showing.
7.9
Holy crap was this a surprise! A good one, too boot! Unlike “old,” Shyamalan lands the plane with the help of a fantastic cast and tight narrative in this one! Dave Bautista separates from the pack of WWE stars turned actors as my current favorite. The breadth and depth of roles he’s willing to take on is promising compared to The Rock’s one size fits all persona and whatever we want to call John Cena’s trajectory at the moment.
Kristen Cui nails it as Wen, and really gives a nice dose of innocence to the screen amongst all of the malevolence and chaos. The supporting cast also does a great job of carrying their weight, but not being overbearing. It’s really well executed, and not trying to be anything it’s not, which I greatly appreciated.
Brett Garten, Movie Extraordinare 