Author: Brett_G

“The Forever Purge”

7.6

I think they finally figured out how to make a great Purge movie!

The beginning got a little on the nose, which I’ve come to expect from this series. There are a couple of points where the narrative trips over itself. But I’ll be damned; they land the plane. And we finally get to wade up to our eyeballs in actual purge happenings!

The characters fit surprisingly well together, and there is an excellent twist on the usual purge film plot. I really came to care about the characters and not root for their untimely death. And… I didn’t want to walk out halfway through this one like I did the last one.

“F9”

7.7

Cards on the table – I would have preferred 2 hours of Tyreese and Ludacris in Space Pontiac Fiero, just making quips and being badass.

I’m only rating it this highly because I knew what I was getting when I went in. The fact that this monstrosity is making the film festival circuit has to be mentioned in the book of Revelations somewhere.

Get ready for narrative whiplash worse than the characters would suffer if they had to obey the laws of physics. Vin Diesel is yet again the only person on the planet still taking these things serious, and decides to take you on a trip to sadsville every time things start to get fun. To the academy: don’t give him an Oscar. Don’t encourage him.

It’s a great action film, and pure spectacle. The “turn off your brain and watch the cars go boom” we’ve all come to expect. Try to forget he’s making a 10th one and decided to piss away all of the goodwill regarding a certain situation from Fast 7. I’m still shaking my head thinking about the decision to greenlight the storyline in this one.

Fasten your seatbelts, and get ready for another 2.5 hour globe-trotting superspy action film. Or, you know, go watch “Tokyo Drift” or something.

Dom, what are doing? The dark side is no match for family meme -  MemeZila.com
Fast and Furious Family Meme
Dom Family Meme Fast and Furious

“Black Widow”

8.4

Hell of a send-off for Scar-Jo! Bravo!

If this is going to be the new Marvel, post-infinity saga, then I will continue to be a butt in a seat for every one. This was an amazingly well done action film/family drama. The runtime felt a bit long at points, but there were some important character things to round out before the credits rolled.

The entire cast killed it. At least the family. (good lord, I’m becoming Vin Diesel) They seem like they’ve been together for 20 films, not just one. Quips actually land, and you feel a sense of closure at the end that makes “Avengers: Endgame” sit much better.

The post-credits scene was a bit deep in the lore for me, but I’ll find a few Wikipedia articles and get it figured out before the next one.

“Zola”

5.8

Not what I expected from A24. Or really from a stripper movie. This was dumber than “Showgirls,” and that’s saying something. I guess the lesson here is don’t ever base a movie script off a chain of tweet and reddit threads. I don’t even think they re-wrote and polished them. Just printed screenshots and ran with it.

Another valuable lesson – don’t go to Florida with a stripper you just met to go dance. Especially when she travels with a duo of… questionable men.

I’ll fully admit that I may have missed some deeper meaning here, but I also feel almost as resentfully confused as I was walking out of “Uncut Gems.” Also slightly offended? Let’s just say I have new frown lines and almost lost my voice yelling “WTF?!?” at the screen throughout the runtime. (Don’t worry, I was the only one in the theater)

“The Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard”

7.6

A really solid sequel!

Salma Hayek serves as a strong addition to the now trio main cast here. Also of note, on par with Samuel L. Jackson in saying “motherfucker.” Made me laugh/cheer every time it happened. The villain was meh, but that’s not really the main reason you’re coming to the theater to watch this. Turn your brain off, watch the explosions, and enjoy the laughs along the way. An excellently executed, tight hour and a half action comedy.